Michael Farris was captain of his college football team. An all-American all star, but his hot-headedness would ultimately be his downfall (pun intended).
He's coming in for the Hail Mary, he rounds a corner, kicks the door down, and it's a bag! Ha! Take that, world! Ah, now I can put my hands in my pockets instead of this.. well if I had any stuff I'd put it in the bag. But I've played plenty of video games, everyone knows that big buildings mean BIG loot! I mean there's probably loads of food just lying around these apartments...
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I've searched the entire block. That's like, 3 buildings! Nothing but clothes! Seriously why would I need clothes?! I look fuckin' sharp already. You know what world, you can take your bag, and your shirts, and your crummy empty buildings, and stick 'em up your ass. I'm outa here.
Cause of death: jumped from a great height.
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